From: gaillard@panix.com (Ed Gaillard) Organization: Putting the Ding in the _Ding an sich_ Newsgroups: talk.bizarre Message-ID: <3hiqg9$3o0@panix.com> References: <3gm0n7$1pn@Starbase.NeoSoft.COM><3h9b21$7eg@news.CCIT.Arizona.EDU> <3hbupo$2f8@er6.rutgers.edu> Date: 11 Feb 1995 12:00:57 -0500 Subject: Re: Captain Haiku [was Re: ICE.BOB: EYE of the SHRINE Ready for Viewing] In article <3hbupo$2f8@er6.rutgers.edu>, Zed wrote: >soren@GAS.UUG.Arizona.EDU (Soren F Ragsdale) writes: > >>I'm Captain Haiku! >>I don tights and fight evil! >>Criminals beware! > >My greatest foe, with >Her repetitious fustian: >The Arch-villanelle! > >[100 quatloos to whomever writes a fight scene between Captain Haiku >and the Arch-villanelle. I'm not up to it tonight.] We meet again, Haiku, o best of foes! Now I shall have revenge on you at last! This time I'll beat you with my rhyming blows. No, Arch-villanelle! I'll defeat you, as I have many times before! My pounding meter shakes you to your toes; bow down before the strength of iambs massed! We meet again, Haiku, o best of foes! I can take my time, sneak up on you as slowly as snails climb mountains. Take that, Haiku! Damn all your Fuji snows! The time for such imagery is long past -- this time I'll beat you with my rhyming blows. My syllables rain down upon your head, just as cherry blossoms fall! I love seeing the way metaphor flows, blood of our battle gouting thick and fast. We meet again, Haiku, o best of foes! Rainbow after storm: the colors of our struggle, like oil on a pond. Oho! the pace of your invention slows! Soon you'll fall back on frogs, you're so harassed! This time I'll beat you with my rhyming blows. I can outlast you, escaping your intentions the way the frog jumps. Now we'll see what the final stanza shows. Have you escaped again, although outclassed? We'll meet again, Haiku, o best of foes; next time I'll beat you with my rhyming blows. Ha! I'll always win -- when your stanzas run out, there's always more haiku! -ed g.