This letter I wrote to .0001% of the world population.... And specially amended on March 26, 2010, to include people who will experience isolated episodes of victimization. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- June 18, 2009 - I must explain an important point which might only be applicable to a tiny percentage of individuals but, in the rare case that such a one may come across this page, it is imperative that I offer what I have learned from various first-hand sources and experiences. Some very few individuals will experience horrendous lifetimes, filled with victimization. Victims often have certain vulnerabilities - weaknesses - which draw predators (victimizers). Often, the lifetime of a designated victim begins with severe abuse for all the years of childhood. The early environment is sick, and there is no family or support structure upon which the designated victim can fall back on in times of emotional (or any) need. The designated victim often goes on to a lifetime of therapies, whereas other members of the sick early environment have not. So, their reaction to the victim's strange plights of difficult-to-believe victimizations will mimic the dynamic of the early environment - emotional abuse, raging, screaming, blaming the victim, etc. Unfortunately, no matter how much the victim may love these others, it becomes necessary to 'divorce' them, entirely, and the victim usually gets to the point when s/he knows the time to bid them farewell from hir life. It's usually at a time of major crisis for the victim, worsened by the abuse and disbelief of the others, and all the love in the victim's heart can't hold hir to a situation that has absolutely peaked, and the victim knows the situation with them will never change. After or during the horrors of the childhood experience, the victim may have the development of mental illnesses. (Once a victim develops but, in ways, even worse, is *labeled* with a mental illness, hir credibility is shot, even moreso as hir vulnerability increases.) These draw predators like a magnet, because the predators will deflect blame by blaming, labeling, and discrediting the victim. The predators get a "free pass" with designated victims who have any sort of mental illness which makes the victim stigmatized and disbelieved. So, there is a nightmare experience of victimization wherein the victim is victimized in very sick ways, then disbelieved, raged at, and emotionally neglected and abused, by the early environment others, etc. Sometimes, the suffering can be alleviated by moving far from the birth place, where a better planet, according to the individual chart, rules the 4th and 7th houses. And I recommend this to any designated victim, because you will still be learning quite a lot - in fact, it will give you the breathing room to learn, and you are really under no obligation to carry more than you want to, if you can escape it. The birth place is generally the worst place for the designated victim to live, because that is where the victimization, abuse, and horror all began, and was predestined, for the purpose of creating the designated victim. If you stay there, or return there, the victimization will follow you and even worsen at various times. I very much recommend using the natal chart, for relocation far away, to find any better planets which could rule the 4th and 7th houses, because no one should have to suffer more than they can bear and end up 'giving up' at too young an age. Life will hopefully give you some breathing space if only you can move to a better location for yourself. Far from the birth place, in a better place, some progress can be made in self-understanding, especially by the study of astrology, and by the examination of the life experiences, grieving for them, and separating from the victimizers of the childhood experiences, sometimes with the help of a good and compassionate psychotherapist. But it just isn't always possible to "cure" or treat certain mental illnesses, so a lot of vulnerabilities will remain. The therapy that should be the mainstream default is the method developed by Dr. Wilhelm Reich, which releases emotion stored in the body's musculature. Dr. Reich became so stigmatized (and was jailed, here in the U.S., and his books banned), due to other more controversial, but some other possibly brilliant concepts and ideas, that certain therapists took his basic method and called it "bio-energetics", but I'm unsure if it's the same method as Dr. Reich's. Out of all the therapies of my own lifetime of therapies, it was the only one that brought past emotional damage out of the intellect and into reality, so that some of it could be released and truly understood. I wish I'd been able to have years of it. When you consider the close relationship between mind and body, it is not hard to understand that the body will store emotional pain, just as the mind will store memories. This is, in fact, visible on the faces of most people. Their facial musculature is quite mask-like due to the tension in the muscles. When the tension is forced out of the various muscle groups (not just the face), it is almost miraculous how much change one feels. The intellectuallization of emotion common in talk therapy is just about useless, unless there is a much less severe, to zero, trauma to work through. Dr. Reich's method can turn very old emotional pain into a visceral realization, and *release* of the emotional pain, stored up since the abuse first began. I very much wish that it were mandatory for every human being to have this method of therapy. There would be a great deal less cruelty in the world, except that many individuals are born to be sociopaths and psychopaths (again, for a metaphysical reason, which doesn't mean they don't eventually suffer the consequences). Chances are, if you are a designated victim, you were given almost super powers by way of inner strength and endurance. Also, you will probably never stop asking yourself why the victimization does not stop, and whether you deserved it, and why you deserved it. Well, you never deserved it, if you have come to understand your own soul, and finally realize you never deserved it. And you're wondering, "how do I understand my soul?" I don't want to be like a Liz Greene book which is full of interesting concepts, but nothing you can actually use, so I'll explain some of the ways I did it for myself: So, here are some tips: What is your very first memory? Think way, way back. And, art therapy may be a useful way to complement the first memory description of yourself. That first memory needs to describe to you something about yourself; it can't just be something like "I remember having Chicken Pox." It must be more along the lines of a first emotion or inner knowledge about yourself. Normally, I think art therapy is 'BS' but, if you aren't involved in the arts, it might be useful for you. In my own case, I found that my first memory, combined with listening to my songs, my various musical tastes, my taste in art and poetry (talk about horror (my former horror movie section below, because I'd been talking about movies for a few months now), Picasso comes to mind...), literature, etc., did reveal my soul to me and it was not at all a bad thing - in fact, it was, and is, a joyful thing. If you do any of this when you're too young, you will almost always get a wrong impression. When young, you will likely be consumed by anger over the life you've had, and the limitations imposed upon you due to your damage. Anger and rage completely cloud what's real about you underneath it. It is necessary to have lived long enough, until all that rage is burned away, for these methods to work. Maybe, for young people, there are other ways to understand the soul, but so far, this is all I know about how to do it (meditation may also help). Your chart will describe you, and much of your fate, but it won't tell you your soul age (which denotes much of its quality). Usually, older souls sign up (yes, you did it willingly!) to be a designated victim. The reason you signed up to be a designated victim is that you are serving a very special purpose. If you will survive as long as you can, you are doing amazing and important work, even if your worldly life is/was an abject failure. You probably assumed, before attaining an understanding of your soul, that your suffering is the result of "bad karma". No. "Bad karma" is being born an AIDS orphan in Africa, or anything comparable in the very impoverished areas of this world. That sort of life is generally short, which is far more merciful than being a designated victim (except that those souls probably have a lot of those sorts of "bad karma" lifetimes). Do you remember Jesus teaching his followers to "turn the other cheek"? Do you know why he taught that? It is all part and parcel of the work you are doing. You are a "lathe of heaven", which is the title of a very interesting science fiction book, but really only that title applies directly to you. What you are doing is helping young souls to evolve. Young souls are pretty much the people who break the laws of man and metaphysics. When they victimize you - because it is ALWAYS young souls who *intentionally* victimize - they will have to experience, from YOUR perspective, in 'living color' so to speak, with every attendant misery, the suffering they caused you. If you "turn the other cheek" now, think how much better they will learn their lesson. They will get an experience of "hell", during the Judgment of their Life Review, that will agonize them as horribly as they agonized you, and help grow their souls (because in this life, as they torment you, they don't have much of a soul at all; I mean, no soul yet possessed of wisdom and compassion). Then, they will have "bad karma", which they will come back here, to earth, to suffer, as many times as needed. We are all here for a reason. There is no such thing as a life without meaning. So, if you are a designated victim, please try to survive, forsaking vengeance, except for standing up for your rights, as long as you possibly can. You are doing more for humanity than most Nobel Prize winners, and I guarantee that when your sentence here is finished, there will be an ovation for you, a celebration of you, that will be heard clear throughout the universe. If you find, after a great many decades of victimization horror, that you just don't have the strength to continue, and you have had many chronic physical illnesses develop which make it all verily impossible for you, well, it is your right to retire (and I don't think there are any penalties for a slightly early retirement, if that's what you really MUST do, and if you are at all worried about that). But I hope you will have the strength to carry on your very important work here. [I'm hesitant to comment on victims who, after unimaginable suffering, did become violent, because I don't condone violence except in matters of absolute self-defense. My motto, in a joking sort of way, is, it's okay if you feel crazy, just keep the body count down, and listen to Jesse Colin Young or something. But then, there are cases that break one's heart, like that of Aileen Wuornos. who, unfortunately, did snap, and did kill. What I feel in my heart for her is so much agony for what she went through, and love for that spirit which was so destroyed, here on earth. I believe, if it's possible for me to feel this way about her, with my puny human love, then there must be a great deal of love for her, more than any of us can imagine, where she is now. So, maybe I'd better leave it at that, because I don't have that kind of compassion for killers, otherwise. She, though, was horribly victimized. And yes, she'll have to work off that debt, but it's an all-things-considered sort of treatment after we pass, much like the type of sentencing one gets by a judge in court, only vastly more compassionate and wise, so for example, she killed out of agony, not out of cold sadism, and she was very broken and ill. She taught a great many souls about the consequences of destroying a child to the point where she'd end up going insane, and then teaching other souls about grievous loss - which might be one of the lessons she'll have to learn, too.] ----------------------- Special Addition on March 26, 2010, Due to an Horrific Recent Experience of My Own: I'm going to have to stress the danger and uselessness of mainstream (maybe all) psychiatrists. I only ever personally met one who was in it for truly helping people, and not just for money, power and "prestige", and that was the one who practiced the methods of Dr. Wilhelm Reich (himself an unbelievable victim of the U.S.). Unless you truly are severely ill, and you know you hear voices or have delusions, stay away from psychiatrists. They are only going to give you exteremely harmful and dangerous drugs, when your condition is truly and safely addressed by what I advise on my page, "When You're In Despair". The psychiatrist I was depending on for the meds I *did* want was only too happy to sell me out to the system here, to save his own ass, and openly admitted it, which might have been the only truthful thing he ever told me. [He is a compulsive liar (in his own words, he "tells stories"), but there is so much worse than that. I can't allow myself the luxury of believing he is above retaliation, so I cannot be open here about all that really happened.] His chart, and the synastry, says it all. So he had absolutely no problems agreeing with the "very nice" people here that I "suffer from delusions" - you know, liars never know the truth when they hear it, nor will they speak it when they know it. I will repeat that, because it's such an important point. Liars never know the truth when they hear it. And I'm finding out there are very few non-liars in the world. As for sufferers of auditory or other hallucinations, I believe you're better off on opiates than the garbage big pharma keeps pumping out, because opiates are not going to give you additional permanent neurological damage and permanent physical illness. But you are not likely to get opiates except illegally, and prison might be worse than a psych ward, except that they can drag you back to the psych ward for no crime or reason at all. The better, and best advice I can give you is to point you towards the books, web site, and viewpoints of Dr. Peter Bregin, who is possibly the only true, humane, and human psychiatrist left in the world. He is anti-dangerous-drug, and he promotes good social support systems to keep people with severe illnesses more grounded, and less plagued by illness. Psychiatry and its henchmen are basically all about social CONTROL, and never moreso than since this new global depression began, and an inexperienced black man was elected president of the U.S. (and I won't even get started on that except to say there is very little reportage of national political news since Obama took office). I also must add that one of the biggest social crimes a person can commit is to be an older, never married, childless woman, who is somewhat of a loner, and not a crack housekeeper. A lot of women with very fiery, especially Sagittarian, charts will fall into this category, especially as we age and lose our friends to death and other misfortunes. (Are you wondering how I know this?) So, whether you are such a woman or not, I have to tell you that it is imperative, if you are a victim, to *never* call the police regarding *anything* unless you have ironclad evidence to prove your victimization. I have learned that the U.S. is little more than a police state once you venture out of the relative sophistication and open-mindedness of what used to be NYC (before Giuliani and Bloomberg ruined it). They can literally do just about anything to you, if you are alone and without close, trusted loved ones, or private legal representation to vouch for you. I sustained a horrifying experience which will have repercussions for the rest of my life. Because I did call the police, without enough evidence (and what I had recorded, they weren't interested in hearing) I sustained a "psychiatric arrest". The police were very concerned about my housekeeping (why didn't I have a curtain in the window of the kitchen door? Etc.), and were baffled by my back massagers ("What are THOSE?"), and were upset by my unpacked cartons (yes, well, I have to move again because an SOB "neighbor" is abusing me!), and other neighbors, instead of corroborating this problem with the dirtbag, which they had done privately about two weeks after I moved in, told the police they heard "a lot of different voices in [my] apartment". YES, that would be the bastard who's been harassing me, but the police have little brains and can't grasp such apparently large concepts. So, I committed one of the worst of all social crimes - I am an older, never married, childless woman, living alone, away from abusive relatives and my few good friends (the police made a big deal about all this), and I'm not the greatest housekeeper because A.) I have terrible arthritis and a couple of broken disks in my back, and B.) I am planning to move, again, surprise, surprise (this was another of my crimes - the number of times I've had to move since 2004, which I only just understood the reason for after moving all the way out to the most backwards place I've ever been - not my best decision). So, planning to move, I didn't see the point in buying a damned curtain for the window of the kitchen door, and had just taped newspaper into it for privacy. It doesn't face anything. [Since my release from "psychiatric arrest" I did buy a curtain, but haven't gotten around to putting it up because obviously I can't drill holes into this place - oh God(s), nevermind with all this crap.] Being a woman is probably the number one reason for being the target of psychiatric crime. I noticed during my "psychiatric arrest" that women outnumbered men in the facility by about 7 to 1 (or more). Women have a lot to get stressed about - we are still abused, harassed, too much work, too much pressure, have those babies, hold down a job, etc., etc., etc. The answer is not psychiatry, but it will probably take the world several thousands more years to understand that. There was another older unmarried woman there whose psychiatric crime was to get food poisoning from a fast food place and vomit in the parking lot. And *she* had friends. And she *still* got comitted. And there was *nothing wrong with her mind*. Other women were there because boyfriends/pimps had called the cops on them maliciously, and most were self-admitted, mainly to get away from abusive spouses for a week! So, for designated victims, or for anyone who finds hirself a victim at any point in life, I offer these observations, and the benefit of my experience, in the spirit of full compassion and empathy. I have to say that my only solace now is in knowing that everyone who has wronged me and harmed me will have to suffer exactly the same as they've caused me to suffer in either this life or another. In the case of the psychiatrists (and their gunmen), and the scum (these are "ghetto" men who live alone without partners or employment - they should be put in all-male housing, that's MY answer to this disgusting police state country which is only too happy to lay the blame on women victims) who have made my life hell since 2007, I am just thrilled. And I'll be even more thrilled when this damned Saturn-Moon Firdaria finally ends (I have those two conjunct in the 12th house of sorrow, confinement, enemies, and imprisonment - also, 12th house Saturn people, especially if Saturn is afflicted, you are in danger from black men, even if you are one - 12th house = large animals, Saturn = black/dark, and the largest animals most of us come into contact with are men - no judgment, we are mammals, don't forget it). And I'll be even more thrilled when I am finally in a peaceful, unharassed living environment again, as I mostly was until around 2007, although things did worsen considerably for me when this Saturn Firdaria began, circa 1999. Bring on the karma and payback. It can't happen too soon, and *thank you* for that, Universe. ---------------------------------- With so much love for my fellow victims, Gail
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All Rights Reserved; Gail Sandra Klein | |