My Corner of the Interweb

Changes...

Mood: Sore, with a chance of light pain...
Music: Life Is What You Make It, Talk Talk.
Game: World of Warcraft, Planetside, Auto Assault Beta, Dungeon Siege II.
Book: The Fountainhead, Ayn Rand.
Muffin: Strawberry-Raspberry.

Life, when you get right down to it, is a series of changes. Some are gradual, some are immediate, some are chosen, and some are forced upon you. My life is no exception to that rule.

I think that, fundamentally, people resist change. And I am no exception to THAT rule. I get nervous when I think about not having anchors. People, places, things. When you move, get married, lose friends, make new friends, find a new job...yes, there's excitement. But also, the fear...the feeling that you're giving up something for the chance at something better. But what if it's NOT better?

This can be trivial, such as trying a new place for lunch instead of going to the old hangout. Or it can be a literal life upheaval, picking up, quitting your job, and moving from Hong Kong to New York, losing your fiancee in the process.

Curiously, I've survived both of them.

Generally, I have, in the past, been as terrified of change as terrified of not being able to change. Some people view this as silly. I view it as being too afraid to go forward and too afraid to fall back. I didn't want to change my situation, and was afraid to solidify my position. I definitely paid for that.

Yesterday, in a roundabout method, my boss offered me a brand new iPod Shuffle for about $60. I grabbed it. I have a perfectly functional iPod, with 30 gigs on it...what possible use could I have for a 512Mb Shuffle? I don't know...but I do know that it brightened my whole day. I'm listening to it now, and I love it. It has no display, no way to see what's next, no way to sort, or look for a song...and I don't care a bit. It is exactly how I use my iPod. I set it on play, and if I don't want to listen to that song, I hit forward, and skip it. I love it.

I quit the Guild that I helped start, and joined a new one. I am now getting more and more absorbed in the higher level content of WoW...and loving it. I have the flexibility that comes with having a large band of people on your side. I am earning more loot, getting better equipment, and having a generally great time running instances. It's jumpstarted my enjoyment of WoW to a new level.

Last week, a new place for lunch opened up by where I work, called Tuk Tuk. It's a Thai/Asian place. And it's excellent. The places we've been having lunch have been getting kinda old, and so this place was a huge step up from what we've been eating. The neighborhood needed Asian...and now I can get an awesome bowl of Pho for lunch.

Lately, smaller things in my life have been moving towards teaching me how to change...some slow changes, some by seizing opportunity, some rapidly evolving.

I am learning to deal with change. Sort of like a warmup for big changes.

While this sounds strange, the guy who had a bag with a change of clothes, a passport, a toothbrush, and a wallet full of frequent flier cards in case he had to go to a country in which they didn't speak English on a moment's notice to stay for a month never really learned to deal with change.

It's funny...but sort of makes sense. I am VERY good at handling a situation. Throw me in a crisis, or give me a problem, I will resolve it. Doesn't matter how big or small. I solve things. I'm not always right, and I'm not always the most efficient, but I do not hesitate for an answer. I "see" the right way, and can attack.

Provided it has nothing to do directly with my life.

Terrorist blowing up your year-long planned onsite event website? No problem. Planned for. Auto-shutoffs, auto-switchovers, and alternate development locale. In the span of 1 hour. In the middle of the night. In a distant city.

Need to recover money from a loser office in Tokyo? How's saving 2.8 million in 5 months? Not enough? Fine. Close it then. Closed in 5 months...recovering all debts, and wrenching waivers of liability from all (former) clients. Well done, Glenn. How exactly do you handle firing/laying off 40 friends? (By giving yourself an ulcer, and telling yourself that if it weren't you, it'd be someone who didn't care.)

But if someone asks me if I'd like to try a new restaurant in Chinatown, my answer is "No. Why?" I have a restaurant in Chinatown. Why would I ever consider switching? What could be better?

But that's changing...like everything else.

Big changes coming. Soon.

Soon.

Posted by Glenn at September 9, 2005 11:44 AM