After a passenger let loose in the bathroom in a way that it, “Resembled the sets in The Wild Bunch if the film had been directed by John Waters instead of Sam Peckinpah,” United Airlines flight 895 was forced to make an emergency landing:

United Airlines passengers found themselves in a fetid situation when their Chicago-to-Hong Kong flight made an unscheduled landing in Alaska after a man had smeared feces all over some of the plane’s bathrooms, airport officials said.

United Flight 895 was diverted to Anchorage on Thursday night, according to CBS affiliate KTVA, and police officials at Ted Stevens International Airport said the landing was due to a “passenger smearing feces everywhere.”

More specifically, officials said the man had dirtied “a couple” of lavatories on the plane and had also tried to cram his shirt down a toilet.

United said in a statement only that the flight was diverted due to “a disruptive passenger.”

This is some sort of metaphor lived in real life.