Previous Material, from before April 2011, Appears Here... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In fact, it's an appear-a-thon -- each old non-sunsigns page leads you farther back in time... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- STUFF -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- December 16, 2011: Although Mercury went direct yesterday, it's still in the post-retrograde Shadow period. I should have mentioned that a lot sooner because of all the Christmas shopping this time of year. Hopefully, any electronics you may have bought will still be all right. Lots more to say about it, but that takes a lot of time. I can sense a change taking place in my life. It's not altogether encouraging because of t Saturn soon to conjunct n Jupiter, with t Sun conjunct n Ascendant. I wouldn't worry, especially about the Solar transit - except that it does occur with t Saturn on n Jupiter, but for the fact that p Sun just hit p Saturn, among other things. You'd have to understand my natal chart, which only a very good astrologer would. I'm not unhopeful, but I'm also not without some apprehension, considering my circumstances. I think I should write more astrological articles, because I could explain certain things that I know very well. It might be helpful to others, just as the astrological observations which others have written were helpful to me. I would like to do it, but I am still dealing with other, very draining, things. But this is a good time to say that I have loved a great many people in my life (other than the awfully embarrassing infatuations I had until my mid 40s), although I never much showed it. I love so many individuals - the sort of love one feels for family, I guess. Teachers (they can be anyone from whom you learned anything), classmates (they can be anyone you've met along the way who touched your heart, somehow). That's what we all are to each other. Oh, there are some I don't love at all, but I suppose forgiveness comes more easily to us in the next life (not that I *plan* to be there anytime soon). I wish you a holiday season softened and brightened by love. It's the greatest gift of all, so why are we embarrassed to show it, and to accept it? Everytime I did try to show my love for anyone I wasn't close to, usually by giving an appropriate gift, I was met with a sort of embarrassment on their part - maybe we all just belong to the Moon-Saturn club? Please try to be kinder. Please try to be more respectful. Please try to understand ordeals from the victims' point of view, and to not be dismissive just because what's happening to them never happened to you. This is the work we are *meant* to do. May love suffuse your soul, and a joyous holiday season ensue. God bless you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- December 1, 2011: There are things you should know about psychopaths. Ever since I got into this indescribably bad situation, I've done a lot of research. Some of the research described things about my apartment I had thought were only odd, despite knowing the freak had the place wired somehow, which confirmed further the visible evidence of how he did it. My life is a nightmare. I can't get anyone to fully believe me, and I can't get out. I've felt I am meant to get him caught, since I do have incredible inner strength, but I risk everything. I risk what little freedom I have left, if I try. And I have no one to back me up. I've lost friends because of "him". I have a problem using the pronoun "him" in reference to the psychopath because I don't view him as being human. What he does is counter to human. His brain is wired differently. They have found this is the case with psychopaths - their brains are "wired differently" from people who can feel empathy and love. To me, that makes them inhuman, and yet, not animals because animals act on instinct. The psychopath understands its actions/crimes are "wrong" because it takes care not to get *caught*. Psychopaths usually appear to be friendly, relaxed people. *They appear to be so.* There are many more psychopaths around than most people expect. It's natural to think the worst of things won't happen in your community, or to a friend, or to a family member, or to yourself. But these worst of things happen to people everyday. Everywhere. I always thought, after I first escaped Chicago, that I had a natural immunity which was kicking in, the way you get diseases when you're young, and then you are immune from them once you're older. That changed when t Pluto crossed my Ascendant, and it hasn't stopped. For nearly 20 years, I'd walk to the subway at 1AM or later to go to work - I was perfectly safe. I lived at night, mainly, and I was safe because I had the basic things in my life which gave me strength. But the seasons of life change, and there are different circumstances to deal with. Age, family, friends, health, wealth, appearance, home - all of these change. As astrologers we know this. But if you've been immune during the strong years, once strength is lost - any part of it - you become a target. You only have to be vulnerable: Then, you are prey, for a psychopath. Psychopaths are usually good at hiding their crimes. Everyone always says, "To look at him, you'd think he'd be a nice guy to have a beer with... you'd never think that he'd..." I've been watching (aside from the TV dramas I mentioned on my blog page) lots of true crime programs, searching for something - some weakness, maybe, or anything that would help me get him caught. All I've learned is what I already know - these monsters present themselves more normally than I do. I'm shy and very nervous, which has waned at certain times in my life, but imagine the state I'm in now. I'm a wreck. "Monster" is the word to use for the psychopath. As an aside, in Ptolemy there is a section on whether the nativity indicates a "monster" - I'm unsure, since I haven't read it recently, whether it relates to a physical deformity (in which case, "monster" is a monstrous word to use) or to being inhuman - a psychopath. They're not new, after all. As long as there have been people, there have been the inhuman, who've done inhuman crimes solely for sadistic purposes. I'm pretty sure the lifetime I've endured hasn't been payback for awful crimes of my own. I know myself very well. Many teachers have told me I'm an old soul. Old souls don't really have much in the way of payback anymore. It's a mystery as to why I've had this lifetime. I haven't always been wise in what I've done or neglected to do, but I did understand *as a child*, never having discussed the topic with anyone, that the "insanity" defense for murder was silly/redundant/stupid, because to murder at all IS insanity. (I'm not referring here to soldiers, whose jobs are not easy.) And I believe everyone, if given to a shrink, would eventually sport a stock label, like "borderline", or "manic depressive", etc. They're into the power trip and they abuse it mightily. No one who has not committed a crime should EVER be dragged from their home. One has either committed a crime, or hasn't. I am the victim of a monster, but I've been treated as a criminal. I've been labeled. Once you are labeled, you might as well go off and build a shack in the woods, because no one will ever see past your label. [In the case of cops, all they need is your name and birth date - badda bing, they've got your drivers' license or state ID and that's that - I had possible information about a dead woman in the news (*not* obtained astrologically) - but as soon as they had my birth date, they no longer cared to meet with me, which they'd been very eager to do before that.]. One's credibility is gone. And, as a victim, one probably needs a weapon, but can't get one. The monster probably has a stock pile. After all, he's friendly and seems so normal. On the surface. And people keep responding to the victim as though she is delusional. She begins to wonder if they're right. She knows they aren't, but after the extreme length of time, she wonders more often, because that would be BETTER than what a monster is doing to her. The monster owns her. Her basic habits change. She does fall into despair and depression. BECAUSE NO ONE BELIEVES HER AND SHE HASN'T GOT THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS TO HIRE PROS WHO'D PROVE SHE IS RIGHT. Normality is nothing more than the ability to empathize, feel compassion, and to not commit crimes. I know what the psychopath who's torturing me looks like. He operates in the way that many of them do - they become friendly with unsuspecting people who are in close proximity to their prey. In my case, they've been neighbors in apartments next to mine. His crime is weirder than the police can understand. He's fucking bugnuts sicko insane, but I'm the one with the label, since I first tried to report it. One problem may have been that I may have had the wrong suspect. I thought I had the right suspect from directional locality, but I had no visual description to go with it - but now I do know who he is *by sight and by sound*, but because he's so friendly and pleasant to my neighbors, I can't get any name he gave them. There are things that came up during the time before I moved last year (and the monster followed and got in here before I did, just like the unlocked last place), that I didn't catch at the time. For example, a cab driver asked me if I knew [forgot the name!] from the apartment complex, and not in a really conversational way - kind of serious. I asked certain things that might describe the suspect I thought was the monster, and the driver said no, and *he* described the monster as I finally know him - age, family background, etc. The cab drivers never asked stuff like that - it was as if the driver suspected, or knew something. There were reports of clothing stolen from the washers... and it happened to be stolen from a woman who in several ways matched my physical appearance. There was clothing stolen from my apartment. I discovered that the screens were no longer in my windows and my windows couldn't get locked - I was on ground level - he walked right in. The woman who'd lived there before me, I heard from a "neighbor", had complained of theft, but "She was fine when she was on her meds..." Yeah, she was too drugged to talk about it, I'm sure. [Theft of women's or children's clothing is a very common monster activity.] But she had a brother nearby. And she was a much younger woman. So she didn't get followed - she wasn't alone. I was. And I have specific vulnerabilities the monster exploits. I'm the monster's dream victim, and I have no idea when he'll escalate. There were other things which honest people could attest to, there. They didn't care to, because I respond loudly and coarsely to torture - the crime was therefore mine, to them. I'm thinking of ways to prove and re-report his crimes, and then rejecting them as soon as I've thought of them, because of fear of being locked up again. The next time an older woman says she thinks something has been happening to her, or to her place, BELIEVE HER, ESPECIALLY IF SHE IS LABELED. She is a monster's dream. What in hell am I going to do? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- November 10, 2011: THIS IS YOUR LIFE: Okay, you lived. You were whomever you were, and you hadn't been a criminal. YOU JUST GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD. WITH YOUR FADING WITS YOU FUMBLE FOR YOUR PHONE AND MIS-DIAL FOR 911: <Recording> "You have reached [phone-static] Jesus Garcia-Al Arabi at [phone static] Services. Please stay on the line and I will be right with you." <Jesus Garcia-Al Arabi> "Yes?" [and you're not sure, but you get the impression he's eating massive quantities of medical marijuana brownies, and he's chewing one right now.] <You> "Hello? Hello? I think I've been shot in the head! It's getting darker..." <Jesus Garcia-Al Ariabi> "We don't [sound of chewing and phone static] here. Have you tried calling [more chewing and phone static] 911?" THAT WAS YOUR LIFE. [On earth.] This might be part of the reason they'll get pushier about those computer chips for humans they already inject into cats and dogs, but I'd be more skeptical about that. I know they already have the little panic alert things - those are for people who haven't been "tagged and bagged pre-terminus". (If 'Life Without Labels' means anything to you, you probably understand what I said.) By the way, no disrespect was intended towards men, anyone with an Hispanic name, medical marijuana, or Jesus (the famous one). It's just that various state services seem to need all four of those in limitless quantities. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 28, 2011: There were a few things I wanted to cover. First, the New Moon we just had a couple of days ago was TOXIC. It was fallen in Scorpio, and in the Via Combusta, and as always, Combust. So there's a lot of stupidity, extremism, and everything possible cruel and idiotic with this lunation (at least it wasn't an eclipse). Venus is also detrimented in Scorpio, and all of this ruled by Mars in sextile to Saturn, in very bad mutual reception. So, what does this mean? A watershed of stupidity and cruelty can be expected. People will care only about themselves, and do things they will eventually regret. And on top of all that, Mercury is in the Shadow period preceding its upcoming retrograde. Expect to find yourself and others acting on impulse, spending money you don't have, not caring for one's fellow-person, taking offense too easily and very easily offending others. If we all took a vow of silence right now, for an indefinite period of time, it would not be a bad idea. Noticing this led me to see that the progressed Solar Eclipse I had on my natal Midheaven a couple of years ago is why my luck has been extraordinarily bad, despite having gone into my Jupiter Firdar. My progressed Solar Eclipse also eclipsed my 10th house Jupiter! My p Sun keeps inching closer to n Jupiter, which YOU probably think is a good thing, but no, it isn't, because the Sun ECLIPSES whatever comes near it. I might have a nanosecond of "good luck" when n Jupiter becomes cazimi to progressed Sun, but that's about it. Maybe I'll correctly parallel park a rented car. And THAT'S IT! (I don't have a car of my own.) I HATE ECLIPSES! Meanwhile, my p Moon has been in Scorpio for what seems like forever, and won't be out of it until what seems like forever. And I've been especially paranoid; I have a schizo freak stalker - it's like every rotten thing a Scorpio Moon can bring. *** And I just saw on the news, they're having fits about babies born addicted to opiate painkillers. SO WHAT? THAT'S "BAD", BUT ZOLOFT or ABILIFY is ACCEPTABLE? ARE THEY FUCKING CRAZY?!!!!!!!!? A baby born addicted to painkillers is BLESSED! For God's sake, do you know how peaceful those things make you feel? So wean the baby off VERY SLOWLY, take a year, if necessary, take 2 years if necessary. Just molecule by molocule. I'm sure you're familiar with the type of progressions which posit that the first few hours, or day, of a baby's life indicates the entire course of the rest of it? Well, just think if you're born on painkillers - the sudden noise, the glaring light, the sudden cold, the crowd, might not be as terrifying. If it isn't, there could be a basis for a life which is more calm, a personality less prone to anxiety - THAT IS A BLESSING! IT IS NOTHING LIKE THE "CRACK BABIES" OF THE '90s!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So now, in Florida, they're cracking down on painkillers, when we SHOULD have the RIGHT to take any drugs we damn well please. It IS stupid to get pregnant while you're taking any kind of drug your kid won't get once it's born, but for the rest of us, it's our Constitutional Right to take ANYTHING we want! FUCK EVERYONE WHO THINKS THEY HAVE THE RIGHT TO MAKE OUR DECISIONS FOR US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK THEM WITH A FUCKING PITCHFORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *** So, what's your opinion on that vow of silence thing? Oh yeah - it would extend to a vow of not thinking for others, too. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- October 21, 2011: I remember, long ago, a conversation with someone from another culture. I don't remember the context, but I remember my conversant telling me there was no word for a particular state of being in hir native tongue. That was another of the "marker" times in my life when I realized that people really are different from culture to culture. If there were no word for a state of being in that language, then that state of being was either repressed (in which case would be a taboo, *with* a word to match?), or actually went unexperienced in that culture. (I forgot what the actual state of being we'd discussed was, too, unfortunately.) As a then young student of astrology, the matter didn't really impact me as it should have. My belief at the time was that we are each unique (and we are) but do happen to share emotions and experiences, even so. But the matter *should* have impacted me. Maybe, subconsciously, it did. It wasn't a word for a thing, like snow (if you've ever seen the movie, "Smilla's Sense of Snow"); it was a word for a *state of being*. This meant that an entire culture, a large culture, had no experience with BEING that particular way. If that isn't the essence of alien, I'm not sure what is. There was something else I wanted to jot down, but I've forgotten because I'm running a malware scan on high boost, which makes it take 4 times longer to type and 4 times more time for a thought to slip away. Oh well. *** Oh! I remember. It was that astrology is a language which can describe anything and everything on earth. You just have to understand the meanings of the planets, signs, houses, and aspects properly. For example, if I said, "I hope your crowd is found soon," when it was your cat who was missing, it would be because I'd used the Moon, improperly, to say "cat", when I should have used Venus, which does represent cats. (And if your cat ever does run away, she has good reason to, and I hope YOU never find her!) Have I "alienated" (Saturn in 7, in more than one configuration) more people now? God, I hope so. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 25, 2011: In my own chart, major things are happening, by transit, and progressions. It doesn't look good, at all, and I am extremely worried. It would seem that the stalker freak is now LIVING IN THE APARTMENT DIRECTLY UNDER MINE. Throughout August, and maybe even in July, I could feel hammering/pounding right under my floor, directly under my bed. Now I know what he did. He installed another speaker or gadget which, without him having to be very loud, causes the floor and my bed to vibrate with low bass tones, just as a regular home sound system does. So, now, he can keep me awake, and disgust me, and make me feel like vomiting, via the feeling that he's in my bed. As I learn more about this freak, I believe he was the one stealing certain women's clothes from the laundry room in the last town/apartment complex. I hadn't put 2 + 2 together, before. I better not write more about it. The more I say, the more those who don't believe me will just think I'm still delusional about this. I AM SO NOT DELUSIONAL ABOUT THIS. As a major sidenote, ever since I moved into this freak's path, which was as soon as I moved to this state, and to that last apartment complex (which was unlocked for quite some time), my little atomic clocks, which self-set via radio waves from the major U.S. atomic clock (in Colorado, I think), never worked, when they'd worked perfectly for years. BUT, recently, there was an electrical power outage due to the major tropical storm, and MY CLOCKS SET! They couldn't before, because of all the RF noise generated by the shit he wired into my apartments, and ever since the power's been back, I notice they are not keeping time properly - the RF noise is again interfering, and they're inaccurate by about a minute, so far. Nothing else could cause those clocks not to work. I have photos of my Lens/RF detector all lit up in here. But I know it can unlight instantaneously - he showed me. He operates all of the electronics by wireless remote, so if he turns off the cameras and bugs, the detector goes dark. But very rarely does he turn them all off - he only did it once or twice to let me know that it would be impossible for anyone but me to see it lit up in here. I also found out that in order to locate cameras and bugs, this particular detector has to be in direct contact with them. Can't do it, because they're patched in behind the fucked-up plaster and fucked-up ceiling tiles. The irony is that if TV news could get this story, they'd be on it like flies on shit. But it has to be "discovered" by police, first, with an arrest made... so, eat your hearts out, TV news. When police are involved, if you're the victim, YOU LOSE. The only thing they MIGHT do, is find some of your remains after some piece of shit finally kills you. I was given two pretty good ideas about how to possibly get this situation out of stasis. They cost money. But I think I can do them, except I don't think it's possible to *completely* do one of the ideas. And even if I do them, I don't know if they'll help get him arrested. There's another thing I have to do, something you'd think was simple enough, but I've just been sort of paralyzed with fear and haven't done it. And now, stuff is on the verge of getting very scary/upsetting/catastrophic in my chart. Truthfully, I can't take anymore traumas right now. People always spout off about God not giving you more than you can handle. Well, millions of suicides throughout the millennia have apparently begged to differ. I think I'm stronger than that, but honestly, I can't take anymore. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 19, 2011: My battle strategies in the entry below have a couple of obvious kinks, but they could be worked out. Meanwhile, as we go about our daily tasks, we might marvel at how, if trackable chips are in everything from credit cards to car tires, and cameras are everywhere, the police still can't find most of the criminals they say they're looking for. And we can marvel at how we've lost everything, while we're at it. But nevermind tracking chips, bugs, and cameras - only remember God sees EVERYTHING we each do, or FAIL TO DO. And when the time comes, God will show us, in detail, each and every one of the things we did, or didn't do, to help our country, or anyone we knew was being abused. And God will, with perfect justice, place us in the positions of whomever we decided not to help, even if it was something so incredibly easy to do, in our sphere of influence, like a stalking-victim-neighbor in the same building, or a stalking-victim-tenant in a building one owns, until we have a fully tortured understanding of what we chose to tell ourselves was too inconvenient to bother with, no matter how little effort it would have taken to, say, give someone back their life, before God will forgive us, INDIVIDUALLY. THAT is how penance and forgiveness REALLY happens. But don't listen to me - go back to your previously scheduled religious programming - it's so much more comforting. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 11, 2011 (Again): The loss of our freedom, and of the very core priniciples of our nation, because we *did* lose them on 9/11, could have been avoided. It's always easy to see where we went wrong, in retrospect. While we were cheerfully being taught "Duck and Cover" and at least 45 years of US administrations were busy obsessing over foreign communism, the Arabs, who'd begun getting radicalized early in the 20th Century were busy immigrating here. If we don't do something about it very soon (if the Third World War doesn't start sooner for another reason), they'll have bred into the USA majority-demographic in about 60 years or so (MUCH SOONER in Europe). They are radicalized, and living quietly for now, here, and increasingly less quietly in Europe. While Bush's wars still rage, and obama starts new ones to suit his purposes (exhaust our troops, continue to bankrupt us while food prices (ALL prices) soar, until conditions are so miserable people begin to riot and he can impose Martial Law and declare himself *officially* to be dictator - you think this is crazy, but *look* at everything that's going on, everything he's done, the people with whom he surrounds himself, or just wait until it happens and see it for yourself), our borders remain undefended. Hezbollah is in South & Central America, and I'm pretty sure in Mexico, running the drug cartels. Yes, they are the same kind of sweet, peaceful Arabs that destroyed our country on 9/11. They can shoot their way right across our borders, whenever they plan to. And thanks to Canada's very high numbers of radical Muslim immigrants, they can just drive through our northern borders whenever they plan to. You must know that World War III is coming. It's only a matter of when. The smart thing to do would be to bring all our troops home, then quickly deport every Muslim in our country, including citizens who've converted to Islam. It would take a while, so we'd have to have timing down to a science on all of this. (I know some innocents would be mixed in, and some we'd fail to find, but we're not harming them, only sending them to their countries of origin, that ARE Sharia Compliant, where they can live by their own rules). It's a matter of getting our country, our freedom, our Consitutional Rights, and the decent principles we try to live by, BACK, while averting WWIII. Read on. Then we need our troops AT OUR BORDERS and IN OUR OWN AIRSPACE, to make certain they can't get in. No, we won't be fully protected because there will be the "obama crew" of '60s radicals and other motley malcontents who'll still carry out homegrown attacks, but at least we won't lose our country as we are bound to do, if we don't get the Muslims out. Bush's wars were a mistake. We were, as a nation, a wreck in every way after 9/11 - we've put on a "brave face", but it's false. We CANNOT fight TERRORIST ACTS OF WAR with conventional warfare! They run and hide and our troops fight and fight, and can never win. I understand why Bush did what he did. But, if he'd had better counsel (which was impossible, probably), he'd have served our country, and the sane world, far better by, first, taking out all of Pakistan's military capability - their weapons! THEN, he should have just nuked Afghanistan. (And if he was paranoid regarding the other Arab countries, which he should have been, then take out their weapons simultaneously, prior to nuking Afghanistan.) Not an easy mission to coordinate, maybe, but a far more effective one at much lest cost to our troops, our people, and our resources. Do you think they'd have dared to do ANYTHING, for a long, long time, if we had only had the sense to do that? No way. (We might have also had to de-nuke North Korea, and some South American countries, though - dangerous, but necessary, and we could hopefully have freed the people of North Korea in the process.) WON & DONE! After that, improve intelligence regarding weapons in other Arab countries, and take out their capability EVERY TIME they'd try to replace weaponry. And, very importantly, BEFORE ALL OTHER ACTION, arm Israel to the teeth with war planes, more nukes, more guided missiles, the lot, and TELL the Pal-Arabs to get the HELL off Israel's back, and return to Syria and Jordan (who won't take them, unless we did all of the above), which was where their families originally came from. Does this sound extreme? Yes it does. Would it at least avert, or make much less probable, World War III? YES! IT WOULD! Would parts of the world call us a bully, and/or "The Great Satan"? YES, they would. But we would have saved the world. This all may sound crazy, and/or offensive on the surface, especially this: Just suppose that the USA is a metaphor of "The Second ( or First) Coming". What if we are *meant* to save the world (we have, before)? Didn't Jesus SAY that He came not in peace, but in conflict (to paraphrase really badly), to save the righteous? Doesn't that sound an awful lot like the role the US has taken on almost from the start? (And yes, I know, in the service of God, but maybe what I propose very closely resembles God's will?) I am not trying to offend, by drawing this parallel. Despite all the awful things in our history as a nation, we truly were blessed by God. God is watching, now, to see whether we do the brave and very hard thing, or whether we continue to let this wonderful gift lay fallow (and eventually die, along with much of the rest of the world), as we've done with increasing fear and trauma, especially since barbarians, who have no interest in freedom, slaughtered thousands of us on 9/11, fully believing they'd get to deflower 72 twelve-year-olds in "Paradise" for their efforts. And if it weren't for obama, then a good, pragmatic, and brave American president COULD DO THESE THINGS, and SO MUCH MORE! STOP CHOKING AMERICAN BUSINESS, and ENERGY, AND ALLOW PROSPERITY AGAIN, AND CREATE AN INFINITELY SAFER WORLD, WITHOUT HAVING TO COMPROMISE OUR FREEDOMS! Freedom requires responsibility. Responsibility requires wisdom and self sacrifice and self discipline. Responsibility isn't always fun or appealing, but we accept it because it's right and just. If you are running for president, and you happen to care about this country and its patriots, and you're not afraid of some initial heat followed by longlasting gratitude and hero worship, you'd do exactly as I say. I have so many memories of 9/11 - my own, which I want to tell you about. But I'd like you to read and mull over what I've written here regarding how to save the free world, and come to understand that it's not even as extreme, and sometimes evil, as what FDR did during WWII. And if you think this is all just the ranting of a bigoted mind, I wish you were right and, one day, so will you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 11, 2011: I'm watching the analysis of the 9/11 attacks on NGEO. Hearing what the Philippine National Police did to one of the would-be terrorists, way back in the '90s, makes me wish we could send all our violent offenders to them. Even then, Wild Bill knew what a threat bin Laden was, but put no order out for his arrest. (They say we don't assassinate key threats around the globe; that's news to me.) Nah, Bill was too busy scheduling his next blow job. It's a sad time now, also, due to a loss in my family. So I'm crying a lot. I hope you remember that we once lived in a more-or-less free country, with presidents who loved our country, and our Constitution (for the most part, & even if some of them were morons or scum), and didn't travel around the globe apologizing for us and returning gifts from the leaders of other nations. (And then start unnecessary military actions without Congressional approval. Oh yeah, we don't have a schizo freak in obama... what name do we ascribe to strange, bizarre, and un-American actions like those, just to name a few? Could it possibly be TRAITOR?) Well, let idiots like Giuliani say we're stronger than ever - it's a LIE. But he probably gets a wave-through from the TSA when he flies (if he flies commercial airlines), etc. He can fool himself, and he and others like him can fool some of the country who have no idea how screwed up it is now (PATRIOT Act, anyone? Obama's regulatory czars & thugs, anyone?), but you can't fool all of the people all of the time. Bloomberg decreed that no one can smoke in NYC (inside OR outside!). (While buses and badly maintained cars and taxis will blast you with a lungful of exhaust with every step you take.) Freedom? Where? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 8, 2011: I took this page down the other day. I'd been reading through it and there are so many typos and errors. Also I'm feeling too over-exposed with recent days' writings, which is an astrological issue I have, natally. All my life I've wanted to do this or that, but couldn't, due to an unshakable need to hide. Yet the ruler of my hiddenness is in my damned 10th (in those battle receptions with Sun-Merc + Pluto which were the parts of me in such earnest need to do what my Asc ruler couldn't let me). So, I really have no hope in hell of hiding anything. If you're human, you'll empathize or sympathize. If you're not, you'll laugh in a malicious way, and one day wake up in hell (according to my religion). Page is back up! I still have to remove older months' babble to another page, plus remove things having to do with the March 2010 involuntary lock-up to another dedicated page. [Good news - <general sarcasm intended> the US Government did visit my site last month (although it seems I haven't written about those criminals for a few months, now). Yes, sadly, the need to provoke is also a natal trait having much to do with my Asc ruler (the part having much to do with needing to hide...) in the poisonous, pot-stirring sign of Libra.] --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 5, 2011: I've been writing apparently conflicting points of view from one day to the next. I know this, but each still makes sense to me in different contexts. By the way, when I said guns protect women, I meant, of course, WATER guns! Yep, nothing stops an attacker in his tracks quite like a WATER gun! And if the cops find your corpse, there might even be a chance they'll catch your killer. Water guns, ladies. Water guns. And maybe pepper spray, if it's still legal. I've been thinking about this whole soul question. I've come up with a theory that makes sense according to my religion, but if I try to describe it, I won't be doing anyone any favors. By the way, again, nothing will make you quite as paranoid as being locked up and told you are paranoid. You are forever terrified of being locked up again, and everything you say is viewed through the corrupt lens of the pseudoscience of psychiatry. For example, if I were to say that guns protect women, a "mental health care worker" would see this as a clear indication of murderous intent. One day, I might write very frankly about my ordeal as a caged "psychiatric patient". For now, all you need to know is that if you ever become one, your good name and reputation are lost forever. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 4, 2011: On the continuing theme of shit, so many things come to mind. I'm aware that I've won almost every battle I've had to fight, if I didn't run. Somehow, I know I have to stay here for the purpose of getting the criminal that's torturing me caged. It will happen. Since I became crippled, and increasingly immobile, gaining information on the freak has been a very slow process. It wasn't until a few months ago that I finally found out which of the males I'd seen at the last apartment complex it was. And this all started the first week of October 2009! Slow going, but I will win this battle, and with it, this war. I would like to move faster on it, but it's a complicated nightmare. I will have him caged before I die. ******** That idiotic yogurt, "Activia", came out several years ago. Its ads boasted it would regulate your various irregularities in two weeks, on one small serving per day. It did not. Now, its ads are saying you need 3 servings per day! Back then, a 6 pack (6 servings then, and two servings now) cost a bundle. Yogurt is expensive, especially the hyped ones. FORGET "ACTIVIA"! 3 of those per day?! Instead, try "Align", as I did, but give it 4 weeks to notice a difference if it doesn't have an effect in two weeks. It is ALSO expensive, but it has no calories, weighs less in a shopping bag, and won't sicken the lactose-intolerant. It's an embarassing topic all around, but at my age, what do I care. After my dearest friend passed on (the only human being who ever loved me), I noticed a weird difference in my body. I attributed it to emotional origins, the inability to let go of my feelings of guilt and grief. The condition worsened steadily throughout the years and I didn't know of anyone else who had the same affliction. A gastroenterologist put me on a vile prescription laxative which did NOT solve the problem one bit, because my problem was something different. It was awful! Well, "Activia"-The-Useless came on the market and, then miraculously, as the manufacturer must have known it didn't work as intended, other companies finally made the scene with probiotics. It made sense that LOW AMOUNTS of helpful bacteria in a food source wouldn't work quite right. I was still extremely skeptical of the probiotics, too. After all, if a fancy gastroenterologist couldn't figure out a cure... (And you wonder why I hate doctors?) In a leap of blind faith, and because it was on sale, I bought two starter packs of Align over a month ago. At two weeks, I was still skeptical. By the end of the fourth week, I was experiencing a miracle. The affliction, which began in 1993, and which by 2003 was a thousand times worse, and which no doctor could remedy, was cured! Of course, one has to keep taking it to experience the lasting cure, which makes a dent in the budget, but it's SO WORTH IT! Now, I don't know if this is also due to other strange changes in my body, or the fact that my internal self-loathing in the aftermath of losing the only two sources of love I've ever had (my wonderful, angelic human friend, and my indescribably magical cat) has been flipped into external loathing of the freak who's been torturing me, thus releasing a lot of guilt I'd held onto and even forgiving myself, in part... but it worked. So, I encourage anyone who has an affliction related to the intestines and colon, whether it's IBS, or anything such as what I suffered (which I won't specify, but it wasn't a needing-a-laxative thing, nor the opposite problem, nor to do with gas - though the disgusting prescription laxative caused that problem, until I just stopped bothering with it), to *try a probiotic*! I like Align, but try whichever one appeals to you. There are three major brands on the market, and probably others. It's definitely less expensive than eating three cups of that stupid yogurt everyday (unless you're a very wealthy yogurt addict, and it works for you). Because I experienced even this positive change, in the midst of the waking nightmare, I am even more certain I will regain my life and privacy as a whole, improve my health, and maybe even be able to reverse my crippling injury, because I WILL PUT THAT SADISTIC POS BEHIND BARS, AND BE RID OF IT! ********* I'm noticing that married people seem generally miserable. I think marriage is a bad idea. I think sex of any kind is a bad idea. I think friendship is a good idea, if one's friend is true. (I'm having a Neptunian touch-me-not phase, to an extreme degree.) Ann Coulter was on some interview, saying the Women's Rights movement only served to destroy the societal structures which protect women. Well, as my theme at the moment is still shit, she's full of it. Maybe *she* was blessed with many protective brothers, but that ain't *my* situation. No. You want to know what protects women? GUNS! (Which is exactly what the gov't is working feverishly to prevent you from getting. Of course. More on THAT shit another day.) If you want kids, I certainly wouldn't tell you that's stupid - if you are empathetic and responsible enough to raise decent human beings. But just how many human souls do you think God created? Do you think God just tosses out billions more to fill all those multitudes of embryos? Maybe you do, but I do not. I believe human souls are finite in number. And if I'm right, what do you suppose takes up residence in all that new flesh? Is it any wonder that when you do hear real news of the world you find out that millions are killing each other every single day? So, knowing that, just WHAT do you suppose is filling all that new infant flesh? Some are human souls, sure, because we do come back (in my religion). But in terms of the sheer numbers of new bodies, no way they're all filled with human souls. I don't know what they are - I only see what they do once they get here. ******* If anyone can correctly guess just exactly what malady I had, which was cured by Align, s/he wins the unique opportunity to buy me a car. :-) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- September 1, 2011: As someone who understands that sexuality is a mutable thing, and that psychiatry is useless at best and murderous at worst, I would say that any pack of shrinks watching LOGO's "A-List" show as their only exposure to male homosexuality would list it as a severe mental illness. I wasn't going to say anything about it, but it's such an amazing example of a bunch of empty bodies full of shadow pretending to be human. Of course that's the way the producers want it to be, because if these were ordinary decent people of any sexual orientation, there'd be no spectacle to watch. It's true of all the horrible "reality shows" I can't stomach. It's the Pluto in Libra people who are the most aggressive, though, about the homosexual spectacle. And it struck me as I watched the show, when a commercial aired for Fleet's new daily enema, apparently something gay men need, that maybe doing something your body isn't healthily equipped for, like getting fucked in the ass and needing a daily enema, just might be a mental illness after all. [Join the club.] I had harsh comments for Ru Paul's "Drag U for Girls" too, but maybe tomorrow. Too tired now. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- August 26, 2011: Heh. I was going to delete the August 19th entry, because I felt better after I'd written it, and I'm always paranoid now lest a "mental health care worker" read my material and decide they'd better lock me up again. But I've just read it over, and it's true, so it will stay. There's no need for me to get angry, though. Yes, I am having to deal with a psychopath still, but it's my own fault catching the freak isn't happening more quickly. I've succumbed to severe depression (for many months now) and have not been very active. Nothing will depress you quite as much as being tortured by a sadist born on June 7, 1966 who has (& check out the violence in that day's noon chart) both the sociopath's knack for making its victim look like the bad guy and the Gemini's knack for finding a way to torture you which strains credulity, and therefore it's much easier for "them", those <extreme sarcasm alert> ever helpful & caring social workers to assume you're terribly ill, and must be locked up again. So it bears repeating, because I've said this before: If you are a woman, living alone, without family or other resources, and especially if you do have a vulnerability, be very careful to always be "appropriate", to never express anger, and to always keep your very best Sunday School bearing or, at some point, you too will be locked up on suspicion of possible THOUGHT CRIMES. If you're heavily Sagittarian, you're sunk, babe, because you can never meet these requirements. But none of this is what I sat down to write. I was going to say something such as, if I were a sentimentalist, I'd think maybe God were angry, and going somewhat medieval on this world. And, now that I think about it, according to my own unique (and unnamed) religion, that's really exactly what's happening. Humanity has been so empty, so spiritually bankrupt for so very long now, "God" *is* angry and throwing a fit (and I don't mean the God(s) of the Old or New Testaments, or any of the other famous Gods - certainly not "Allah", or the Bhuddist or Hindu or Wiccan or Pagan gods, so I'm not saying anything sacriligious about anyone's favorite God). Unfortunately, it's not quite "medieval" in flavor, although God only has the one repertoir considering the medium - no, this stinks of the Aquarian Age to me, and nothing has a stench quite like it. Used to be people burned down their cities for some "cause". Now, it's just the cool think to do, because no one ever taught them otherwise, and they're as morally, ethically, and spiritually bankrupt as a recycling bin filled with used Pampers. Was that all I set out to say? It doesn't seem like much. Maybe my Neptune-Alzheimers kicked in again. Good morning, Irene. What's the blue plate special today? Heh. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- August 19, 2011: As I reflect upon all I've been going through, and considering the horrible state of the world, some obvious points come to mind. The Pluto in Libra & Pluto in Scorpio generations have begun to impact the world. I'm not sure which of them will be worse. I had hopes for the Pluto in Scorpio kids, but it might only turn out that they'll have the highest crime rate in world history. The Pluto in Libra kids are obnoxious - they seem so nice, but they have major aggression issues, so they'll end up stabbing you in the back, whether they planned to or not. Or, they won't bother with any pretense and will be in-your-face with anger and hatred. We see it in the vicious crimes and riots all over the world, and in the repulsive jihadist-nazis - the truth is, they just don't need an excuse. They're venomous snakes with or without a cause. This began in the US with the 1960s (and think of the scare in the 1950s regarding "Juvenile Delinquents" - Alfred Hitchcock would be glad to be dead in *this* erea!). I used to think Women's Lib was about choices - turns out it created a polar opposite affect. As women stopped taking care of their kids so they could pursue careers, and as divorce became common-place, three generations of kids became 30% (not a scientific figure) more likely to become sociopaths. Then you take the kids who did have stay-at-home moms and intact families - what percentage of those families were unaffected by the wars and all the crazy-making energies of the '60s? Not many, is my guess. The people having all the kids need intensive preparation before they do. They ought to have 4 years of parenting classes in high school. They ought to have 4 years of relationship training in high school. At least! And the drop-outs and home-schooled kids should still have these mandatory classes - give them a choice - the classes, or solitary confinement in prison. We have all these people who couldn't empathize if their lives depended on it popping out kids they don't supervise, or listen to, or care about, or set limits on, or LOVE. It's not only the violent video games and the utter crap they call music which ruins these generations - it's their absolute crap parents, and lousy public school teachers who can't be fired! This is what I've learned: If you are a woman, you can be a mother, OR have a career - NOT BOTH, SIMULTANEOUSLY! If you are a woman, you can live either a reclusive, or single & sexual lifestyle, but you had better know that sooner or later you will be victimized badly by a male. (Even being married is no guarantee of physical safety, and you'll certainly sustain a share of blows to your mental, emotional, and spiritual existence; but that's married life, or life in general.) And if you are a woman and a single mother, you'd damn well better put your kids as your TOP priority in life - and I don't mean staying out at a job at all hours to earn the money to support them - and that's why you're a damn IDIOT! Because likely, that is what you have to do. And you're probably flirting with some bum at work who has no interest except to get inside your pants and/or your wallet! And that's why you're a damn IDIOT! Men: Just about all of you are SCUM! You sleep around, you don't care about your kids, you don't know HOW to be men! You knock up women and then you don't raise your kids. You're either a controlling freak, or you're disengaged. You don't know HOW to be MEN! Or HUMAN! You don't get it. No one taught you. THEN.... there are the opposites. The uber-anti-choicers who brainwash rape and incest victims to carry the nine month trauma because the "poor little baby isn't to blame!" [There need be NO ZYGOTE/BABY from EVIL - there's the pill that prevents conception after these sick, twisted, disgusting and ruinous crimes] because, as that anti-choice "counselor" told me, these girls find that something good can come from something bad [isn't that a universal LIE? NOTHING GOOD COMES FROM EVIL!], and the girls find it has a redemptive quality to bear and birth the fruit of evil [which destroyed a certain part of them forever!]. And I listen to this PIG and I want to flip back to voting Liberal so pigs like her can NEVER FORCE THEIR SICKNESS on this country by LAW. Except I can't flip back, because the modern Liberals are revolting swine of the opposite type. There you have it - a world full of bodies with inactive souls, and imbecile thinking, constantly perpetuating, with no more individuality than Borg drones. Your brats are rioting in the streets. Some of them are also the kind of sick little scum like the psychopaths I attract like flies to a corpse. Do I sound angry? Have I offended, when you thought there might be some part of me that could possibly be thought of as a nice person? Oh my. It must be my Ascendant ruler in LIBRA, also ruling my 3rd of letters, in battle receptions with my Sun & Mercury. Yes, this is a harsh entry. And it's a harsh world too if your eyes are open. I don't exclude myself from this mess. I made mistakes I won't forgive. But at least I'm not out to hurt anyone, unless you chose to read this and found it insulting. IF you found it insulting, it's only because you're the type I'm railing at. Have a nice day. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- August 16, 2011: As a sidenote to what I wrote in my blog yesterday, has it struck you that from across a few million light years (or less), anyone gazing up at their alien sky and seeing our Sun sighs, knowing it's the light from a long dead star... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- August 3, 2011: As if things weren't bad enough, I'm getting a Neptune thing which is absolutely wiping me out. Of course, I'm sure I could see the same effect with Classical methods, but my brain is too fogged up to figure it out. I'm in my Jupiter Firdar, but that doesn't help much, since Jupiter rules my 12th, and my imprisoned Moon-Saturn. And of course, Jupiter rules my 3rd - the house which, among other things, indicates afflictions to one's home. But I can't go into that, because I am still working on getting the psychopath stalker caught. My progress has been unbelievably slow, due to the lack of info I had until recently. And now, Neptune is doing that thing, where 3 cups of coffee can't clear my head. God, life sucks. Which is why we are here, of course. If your life is awful, and you believe fortunate/happy people have "good karma," you are wrong. The word "karma" means action, and unless there's evidence that they are good, ethical, moral, and selfless, it is not "good karma." Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the famed and brilliant thanatologist, used to tell terminally ill and suffering children that, just as in school the teacher gives the hardest lessons to the most gifted/best students, so it is that God gives the hardest lessons to the most gifted/best souls. Risking hubris, I'd have to say this probably applies in my case, although I'm sure I have been a hugely disappointing student. So, if I can slog through this mess and the stalker gets arrested, tried, and convicted, I wish to do something about the way the police respond to less conventional sex crimes. If I could accomplish that, maybe it would have a slightly redemptive quality. Oh, and I had made a forecast several months ago about August 19th? Well, it should be on my Forecasts page. It had something to do with the eclipses and Saturn, I think. We shall see. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- July 8, 2011: The disasters will continue for a long time. I noticed that there's an active mid-degree formed by the January Solar Eclipse, the June Lunar Eclipse, and the outer planets which are still hanging around 4 to 5 degrees Cardinal. Also, the July 1st Solar Eclipse squared Saturn, among other things. Not good. More flash mob robberies, riots, and increasing costs of food, gas, and electricity. The use of our "Strategic Oil Reserves" is a disaster. It's only meant to be used as a last resort, if we were in, oh say, another world war, which we will be, unless a miracle happens. I haven't been able to stomach listening to the news, so I'm taking a vacation from it. But I did notice the interesting *timing* of a U.S. nuclear power plant being threatened by a *rare* (for that location) wildfire, just on the heels of a different one being threatened by flooding. Hmm, maybe it's because I haven't been following the news too closely, but I haven't heard more about it since those stories broke... Oh, and good news! As if the hellish weather and various disasters destroying farmland and crops weren't enough, the TIC gave a whole bunch of our grain to, was it China? Oh! And more good news! George Soros, who said he "liked helping the Nazis", and that "It's fun to play God", and who destroyed the economies of at least 5 countries, not to mention "breaking the Bank of England", bought, in June, a huge reserve of our national food supply - oh, you know, nothing we can't do without, like a majority of full grain silos, etc. Yeah. That Soros, always giving us things to be happy about. What a guy. (Psst... he funded McCain's campaign in 2008 - what a giver he is!) So, he's got himself all set up in a New Hampshire mansion, I bet just playing pinball, goofing off, and buying everything of value we still have. You know, I bet he's just throwing money at Mitt Romney's campaign, because that's the kind of great guy he is! That way, if Obama loses (which will NEVER happen because he's doing such a stellar job!), we'll get Obama Lite in Mitt Romney! After all, Jon Stewart, the Liberal Satirist From Whom Young People Catch Their News, says if you opened a box marked Republican President, Romney would be inside! And who isn't influenced by Jon Stewart, anyway? All you crazy tea party people who believe a 14 Trillion Dollar Deficit is a bad thing? And that "Quantitative Easing" (ya know, when you just print money out of thin air, and say, look, More MONEY!) will make our currency worthless because there's nothing of value backing it? As if! No! It's a GOOD idea. It's a GOOD idea to be involved in a war, um, make that a kinetic something-something, in Libya, without a goal or permission from Congress! It's a GOOD idea to join up with Arab nazis! It's the Arab Spring! And who doesn't just LOVE the prospect of killing every last Jew, and converting to Islam and living under Sharia law? Hey, girls, it's not like you'd lose your rights! You'd be spared every indignity, have tons of babies, and if you get raped, you'll be stoned to death, or set on fire! Sounds SO GOOD! And what's with the TIC starting a war in Yemen without telling anyone? Oh, I'm SURE that's for our own good, too. Government owned businesses? What could be wrong with that! Only 17% of 8th Graders at the 8th Grade Level? Who cares, as long as teachers get big pensions, can never be fired, and get three month vacations! The NLRB telling Boeing it can't start business in its new Right-to-Work-state plant? So what if thousands of jobs aren't created in the private sector so long as the big unions make bigger government! Big government is GOOD! It tells you ALL THE THINGS YOU CAN'T DO! Just like Mommy when you were two years old! It's not as if you're a GROWN UP or anything? RIGHT?! Well, kids, I'd just love to sit and chat about stuff all day, but I have to go take an aspirin. Are they still legal? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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I wish you peace, good fortune, and, of course, good health.
Gail
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| All Rights Reserved; Gail Sandra Klein | ||